John: I grew up in a very small town in Western, NY. I was raised by two very hardworking parents. I have one sister, who I have grown closer to in recent years.

When I was younger, I didn’t leverage the talent that I was told I had. You could say that younger me would be lazy, and you’d probably be right. When I didn’t get what I wanted, you could say I pouted, threw tantrums and was an entitled melodramatic jerk, and you’d probably be right.

When I got older, I thought everyone should do what I said, and when they didn’t, I would get angry and blame them. To say relationships were not easy for me, well you’d probably be right. I tried coaches, but when they wouldn’t tell me what I thought they should, I’d quit. Was I at fault? You can say so and you would probably be right.

As I have gotten older, I have learned the lessons of accountability, doing what you said you would do, when and how you said you would do it; keeping your word, treating everyone with respect and being selfless, rather than selfish. I listen more, I talk less, I observe more, I spout off less. To say that work, my relationships, my overall sense of well-being has improved, you’d probably be right.

My point is that people say change is hard. No. It isn’t. You change when you want to.

Maturity. It means as you grow you get more powerful as you give your “power” away. Life is big and complicated and confusing. Sometimes it is and sometimes it isn’t. It’s unique and crazy, and there are no instant replays.

But every day is special. A once-in-a-lifetime thing. Sandy, it’s another reason to be grateful huh, and whatever your reason, you’ll probably be right.

Sandy: As always John, I really appreciate your honesty and self-awareness.  I’m impressed by your willingness to look clearly at yourself and take responsibility for what doesn’t work, as well as for what does.

You say that change isn’t hard.  I’m not sure I agree with that.  Change means getting out of your comfort zone, and many of us like our comfort zone because it’s familiar and we know how to deal with it.  Even if it’s not a happy place, it’s familiar and that goes a long way towards keeping us there.

Many people don’t believe they have what it takes to do something different, so they stay stuck.  Therefore, change is hard.

It’s been my experience that people finally change when they hit some kind of bottom.  Then they decide that anything will be better than staying where they are.  The alcoholic who has lost his job, wife, family and house, might decide that giving up alcohol would be better than staying in the place he is in.  Or the abuse victim who has had too many broken bones might eventually decide that something else, even if it’s uncomfortable, would be better than continuing to be abused.

I agree with you that once we decide to change, then we can do it.  It’s still not easy, but it is always doable.

I also agree that every day is special, and how that day goes is completely up to each of us.  Regardless of the circumstances, we can choose to look for the good or the bad, and sure enough, that’s what we’ll find.

It’s wonderful to know that your days are good, and continuously getting better.  That’s a good message for us all.

Please comment so others can benefit from your wisdom and experience. 

Sandy is now offering a FREE Coaching Call, so you can see what Coaching is all about.  Please email her at Sandy@insidejobscoach.com and put FREE Call in the Subject Line.  She will get right back to you to schedule your call. 

For FREE worksheets on ways to empower yourself, see the Resources Page on our Inside Jobs Coach website.  Also be sure to check out our Books and Programs page. 

If you’d like to bring positive changes into your life, we have the perfect thing for you.  Check out The Rapid Power Pack, and begin to create the life of your dreams. 

If you would like to feel more confident and believe in yourself, check out The Confidence Pack, which contains several powerful worksheets to guide you and an amazing hypnotherapy session to strengthen your belief in yourself.