When I was a child, my family had traditions for every holiday. I took comfort in always knowing that Thanksgiving Day would be spent at our house with my Dad barbecuing the turkey, and Christmas Eve would be a gathering of my father\u2019s family at the home of one of my Uncles. There was never any question of where we\u2019d go or who would be there, although there was always interest in what new boyfriend or girlfriend our teenage cousins would bring along. Even after I married, my husband and I lived near my family, and he fit into the established pattern. When we had children, they just fit in too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Then we made the radical decision to move to Oregon, and I was worried about what I\u2019d do without the traditions that had defined the holidays for my whole life. My fears were unnecessary since my parents soon decided to retire and move here, too, as did two of my aunts and uncles. With some modifications, we once again had the comfort of the routine. Thanksgiving was at my parents\u2019 house, with barbecued turkey, playing pool, and watching football. Christmas dinner was at our house, with my husband barbecuing another turkey. New Year’s Day was ham at my Aunt Carol\u2019s, and Easter was family brunch at the Country Club. It was a comfortable yearly tradition that gave our holidays structure and that we raised our children on for 20 years.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
However, in the past few years, our children have grown and moved away, my mother, father, Aunts and Uncles have died, and the big old house with the pool table is now a lovely memory.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
So here I am, wondering what one does do to celebrate the holidays. I must admit I wasn\u2019t prepared to deal with this new dilemma since I naively assumed everyone would always be here and things would just go on as they always had.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Since our children moved away and my parents died, I\u2019ve taken each holiday as it comes and tried to find the true meaning of what the day represents. Before, it was always about family, but now that my family is dispersed or gone, what does that mean?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I\u2019ve come to realize that there are many definitions of \u201cfamily.\u201d It\u2019s not just the people connected by marriage or blood, but it\u2019s also the people to whom we\u2019re connected by friendship and love. In these past few years, I\u2019ve looked around and realized my husband, and I are blessed with lots of \u201cfamily\u201d. Our dear friends, who travel with us and put up with us at all hours of the day and night (even those grumpy morning hours), our friends who play cards with us and with whom we laugh late into the evening. The women I\u2019ve connected with on a deeper level since we\u2019re no longer spending time parenting, and so have time for each other. All of these and many more are family, and on every holiday, I do what I can to gather together as many of these wonderful folks as possible.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Of course, the \u201ctradition\u201d has changed.\u00a0 There is no routine anymore.\u00a0 Every holiday is different, depending on who is available to share the day. I\u2019ve realized that tradition isn\u2019t really about what we eat or where we go.\u00a0 The thing that continues to make each holiday \u201ctraditional\u201d is that it is a gathering together of people who care about each other.\u00a0 I now know it\u2019s a time to celebrate one another and remember how we are all family.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Sandy Abell is a life and business coach, best-selling author, speaker, and Licensed Counselor. She specializes in working with professionals, entrepreneurs, and people dealing with life transitions<\/em> and is the author of several books. She is also the co-host of a great podcast called\u00a0Your Personal Power Pod\u00a0\u00a0and is excited to share it with you. You can hear it wherever you stream your podcasts or at\u00a0www.yourpersonalpowerpod.com<\/a>. You can reach Sandy at\u00a0sandy@insidejobscoach.com<\/a>.\u00a0 She\u2019d love to hear from you.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" How to celebrate the holidays when children are grown, family moved away, and traditions have changed. This is how we celebrate now.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":2576,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[26,21],"tags":[66,72,99],"yoast_head":"\n